David I. Brandt,  - Psychoanalysis • Psychotherapy • Counseling
Tools & Insights

Does the Perspective of the Listener Matter?

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Interesting Commentary on Marriage

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(Do you see these couples as potentially peaceful? Bored and mechanized? Close or distant? OK or not OK?)

Can One Ever Successfully Possess or Fully Know Another Person?

“Marriage … that odd mixture of violent devotion and legitimate lust in which desire eventually gives way to a forced and decorous composure that captures the essential opacity of even one’s most intimate partner”

Alberto Moravia (translated from Italian)

Getting to Know You!?™

Getting to Know You!™

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"A man must eat a peck of salt with his friend, before he knows him.” Miguel De Cervantes

And that is A LOT of salt!  It takes time to really know if someone will become a friend or not (or a lover or not).  Too often we impulsively jump into a relationship, whether out of desperation, fear of being alone, insecurity, and/or over-exuberance - only to find that we actually had very little on which to base the relationship.

Problem vs. Solution Focus

Problem vs. Solution Focus

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Found this quote below. Sometimes, we really do need to focus in on, and deconstruct, issues, if only to raise our own consciousness of their essential components and/or of the issues themselves. There also comes a point where:

"If I focus on the problem, the problem gets bigger. If I focus on the solution, the solution gets bigger."

Thank you to Twitter @jonniqueen (whoever you may be!?) for this one.

As Paul Simon said, "Remember, one man's ceiling is another man's floor!

(Thank you Laura Slap for this one.)


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The Secret Blessing of Letting Go:

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A Friend is ...

A friend is one to whom one may pour out all the contents of one's heart, chaff and grain together, knowing that the gentlest of hands will take and sift it, keep what is worth keeping and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away.

~George Eliot

Help Your Inner Self to Emerge!

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Orienting and Partializing™

Orienting and Partializing™

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Tend to procrastinate in the face of bigger, time-consuming tasks? Or in the face of stuff you just don't feel like doing?

Try doing five minutes of the task before lunch or dinner so that you ALREADY are in process/progress with it when you take a break. Now you are over the "unknown" aspect of it.  It is already now familiar and real (vs. built up and imagined) and you might have even started to gain momentum or get ideas about it.