David I. Brandt,  - Psychoanalysis • Psychotherapy • Counseling
Tools & Insights

Communication Skills

Does the Perspective of the Listener Matter?

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Interesting Commentary on Marriage

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(Do you see these couples as potentially peaceful? Bored and mechanized? Close or distant? OK or not OK?)

Can One Ever Successfully Possess or Fully Know Another Person?

“Marriage … that odd mixture of violent devotion and legitimate lust in which desire eventually gives way to a forced and decorous composure that captures the essential opacity of even one’s most intimate partner”

Alberto Moravia (translated from Italian)

Getting to Know You!?™

Getting to Know You!™

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"A man must eat a peck of salt with his friend, before he knows him.” Miguel De Cervantes

And that is A LOT of salt!  It takes time to really know if someone will become a friend or not (or a lover or not).  Too often we impulsively jump into a relationship, whether out of desperation, fear of being alone, insecurity, and/or over-exuberance - only to find that we actually had very little on which to base the relationship.

Problem vs. Solution Focus

Problem vs. Solution Focus

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Found this quote below. Sometimes, we really do need to focus in on, and deconstruct, issues, if only to raise our own consciousness of their essential components and/or of the issues themselves. There also comes a point where:

"If I focus on the problem, the problem gets bigger. If I focus on the solution, the solution gets bigger."

Thank you to Twitter @jonniqueen (whoever you may be!?) for this one.

As Paul Simon said, "Remember, one man's ceiling is another man's floor!

(Thank you Laura Slap for this one.)


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A Friend is ...

A friend is one to whom one may pour out all the contents of one's heart, chaff and grain together, knowing that the gentlest of hands will take and sift it, keep what is worth keeping and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away.

~George Eliot

Refrigerator Magnet Psychology/Wisdom! Heed!

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Walking on Eggshells™

Walking on Eggshells™

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Having to walk on eggshells around someone can be irritating, self-esteem annihilating, and may, over time, encourage completely giving up on communication with the person that makes one feel that way!  This in turn can lead the 'eggshell-walker' to passive-aggressive responses, over-sensitized responses, non-democratic decision-making (usurpation), and/or a whole host of other sequelae, as communication 

Recipe for Couples Therapy?

Recipe for Couples Therapy?               (Click on Cartoon to Enlarge)